I was in a long-distance relationship for several years with a girl from the Philippines. It was almost impossible to get her a visa to stay with me and I had no way of earning a living while in the Philippines until recently. Here is how we managed to stay together for a number of years before finally being with her.
Before I get into How to Save a Long Distance Relationship, here are the pros and cons of a long-distance relationship
Pros of being in a long-distance relationship
• You’re forced to trust the other person. This wasn’t too difficult for me as the girl I knew was very honest and loyal but she had to learn to trust me.
• You learn patience and self-control. This can be difficult at first but it gets easier over time.
• You spend a lot of time getting to know each other before you meet. I spent hours talking using skype and getting to know the person personally before travelling to meet her and then again before I traveled back a second time
• Being in a long-distance relationship tests you both. If you can survive a long-distance relationship, you’re relationship when you’re together is much more likely to work out.
Cons of being in a long-distance relationship
• You may not trust the other person. It can be difficult to trust the other person over long periods of time. This can lead to doubt and accusations.
• It can be frustrating. Not being with someone both physically and intimately can be very frustrating.
• Lack of patience. Some couples do not have the patience to stay the course and wait until they’re together
• Time together is more rewarding. The time that you spend together when you are together will be more rewarding if you have waited first.
Here are some tips on how to save a long-distance relationship.
1.) Set a Goal of when you’ll be together
This goal may not just be a date of when you’ll be together but also how you’ll be together. For me I had to earn over a certain amount online before I could support myself before moving to the Philippines.
2.) Be open to conversation Anywhere
Be open to conversation at almost any time or place. If the other person can contact you via Skype or Snapchat anywhere, then this reduces suspicion that you’re cheating on them. It also makes the relationship feel less distant.
3.) Send gifts Often
You can send both physical and virtual gifts to anyone around the world. My favorite was a cheap gift delivered to her home sent from a shop in the Philippines.
You can send virtual gifts such as e-cards, or physical gifts such as roses or chocolates. Just type the name of her country or state and the gift you want to send.
4.) Take part in online activities
There are many such online activities. Everything from virtual weddings, virtual kisses that can be customized, to a virtual reality service where people can interact with each other. For example at imvu.com you can interact with people much like online GTA, but a social, romantic one.
With wishbeats.com, you can send a personalized song which is specially written for your loved one, or you can send a gift or personalized video which celebrates the time you’ve spent together. This can include your most cherished memories in the form of video clips or photos
You can use sync-video to create a private chat room where you can watch YouTube or Vimeo videos with them. With online streaming, you can listen to the same station at the same time.
5.) Update your Social Media
One way of increasing trust is to use social media such as facebook more often, updating the other person of where and what you’re doing. It’s harder nowadays for people to disguise cheating when their social media is available for anyone to see.
6.) Learn to Trust One Another
This leads onto the last point. Even though you can take steps that make it harder to cheat on one another in the end you’re just going to have to learn to trust each other. This will come through time, effort and openness.